How to Defeat Your Insecurities

Insecurity is the lack of confidence on oneself. In other words, self-doubt. People can be so full of it that they forget how to control it. Many teenagers have been victimized by this silent killer. They have always lived in the fear of not doing something good enough and eventually becoming a disappointment to others. They’ve been trying not to disappoint others too much that they started relying their happiness on others judgments – which is definitely wrong.

What can be done? One thing is for sure: You cannot just easily change what other people think of you; you cannot always please them. You cannot just alter what other people’s definition of beauty is. Each of us thinks differently, and no matter how hard you try, there will always be those who couldn’t appreciate you as who we are. So again, what can be done? First, realize that your flaws, no matter how unappealing you may consider them to be, contribute to your being and uniqueness. You shouldn’t let these things pull you down. Hence, you should use them as motivation for improvement – while keeping in mind not to torture yourself along the way. Next, it is important to stop trying to always please other people. That sounds cliché, but yes, if you let your happiness and self-satisfaction always be dependent on others’ judgments, then you will also always be a prisoner of their thoughts and words. And you wouldn’t want that. Third, you should surround yourself with peers that value the real you, as well as contribute to your self-growth. I know it’s not exactly an easy thing, but it is essential. Your peers will either support you or destroy you, and it’s your job to choose the right people. And lastly, but most importantly and also probably the most obvious, you must learn to accept your flaws. I am not saying you just simply give up on the world because you decided to accept the fact that you’re a ‘failure’ since you can’t do this or you can’t do that; I am saying that you have to accept the fact that you’re a human being, it is normal to have weaknesses and shortcomings, and it won’t kill you not to be perfect. It may take a lot of time for acceptance, and you may want to give up along the way, but if you want to free yourself from your own harmful criticism, then you should learn to embrace your own flaws, limitations, and imperfections. As they say, “There is no greater enemy than yourselves.”

The best thing you can do to overcome insecurity, and what you should be doing all along, is to realize that you’re better off than you think. Every day is the chance to make yourself the best person you can be for you. Don’t worry about everybody else. Don’t compete with people. Compete with you.